“I can mingle with the stars, and have a party on Mars.”
Keep it coming, keep it going. Don’t stop the abuse. I can take it. Tell me I’m not good enough again… tell me I’m not who I think I am, go ahead keep discouraging all my dreams keep telling me I’m not good enough. Tell me that I’ll never be better than him. Tell me I’m not good looking enough. Tell me how me helping you with self esteem will help me as well. Tell me you can’t stand the look of my face. Tell me you don’t wanna be around. Tell me I’m the worst, tell me I’m the definition of mediocre. Tell me if I cry I’m less than a man, than tell me my tears are funny. Tell me everything i ever thought was real was an illusion. Tell me I ain’t worth it. Tell me you don’t care. Then tell me you’re sorry. That you didn’t listen to my words before, that you should of paid attention. Tell me how you feel bad that you weren’t there. Tell me that you thought I was okay and strong. Tell me before I pull the trigger.
Everyone is strong until they aren’t. Never assume, just care more.
“Depression is such a cruel punishment,
there are no fevers, no rashes, no blood tests to send people scurrying in concern,
just the slow erosion of self, as insidious as cancer.
And like cancer it is essentially a solitary experience a room in hell with your name on the door.”
“Only once the drugs are done, I feel like crying…I feel like dying. “